Top Five Things to Remember to Prevent a Ruined Wedding

Maureen Parnell, (How to Have a Wonderful Wedding) says there is only one hard-and-fast rule about your wedding:

Your wedding is YOUR wedding!
As you plan for your Big Day, of course you will consider the feelings and concerns for family and friends, but what you want and how you feel is the priority, because it's all about you. Here are some tips to help you plan and create a memorable wedding day.

1. Create a Wedding Notebook
Most wedding couples keep a sectioned notebook with a master list and then, a breakdown of to-do tasks. Here's your list for Section 1:

• Set the date
• Determine the place and time
• Contact friends and relatives who have to travel to discuss the date. Don't set a date without making sure Grandma in Scranton will be able to attend!
• Designate roles and contact those friends and family to see if they accept and are available for the day.
• Arrange the honeymoon and set aside your travel necessities (tickets, passports, etc.) for easy retrieval after the wedding.
• Let your mothers decide what they will wear.
• Wedding Registry should include stores available in most cities.

2. Wedding Planner
This person doesn't have to be a professional. One of your friends may be an organizational go-to and will undertake the time-consuming tasks, like information-gathering. He/she can then offer you options (decorating, cakes, menus, etc.). It's truly important you have a wedding planner -- even if it's you.

3. Money Talks
With a wedding, money also walks . . . quickly, away from your pocketbook. Plan a budget and be ruthless about sticking to it. For every expense you can see, there will be another one you can't see. Surprise! The musicians charged overtime! Surprise! That add-on you thought was free had a fee. Plan every expense for "worst-case scenario," so that you have enough padding for the surprises. I've never known anyone who broke even or had money left over after a wedding, but why don't you be the first?

Don't make assumptions. Aunt Grace may have given your brothers, sisters and cousins $200 each wedding, but don't plan she will do the same for you. Circumstances change, situations change, and Aunt Grace now may have less disposable income than before. Never assume your parents will take on the traditional expenses, even if you are having a "traditional" wedding. If no one has offered to pay for your honeymoon, do it yourself. If the bride's mom does not offer to buy the wedding gown, you're on your own.

3. Stationery
Order your wedding stationery, invitations, place cards, and personalized table gifts well in advance. This commits you to your date, time and place.

4. Guest List Angst
This can get tricky, so involve your parents, ensuring they understand you have the final say. Extended/divorced families may have baggage, so where to put someone's ex and the reception seating could be a virtual mine field. Do your best to let every relative and friend know that you value their presence, put the fighters in separate corners and hope for the best.

wedding ring